1. Gwynth Paltrow (for obvious reasons)
2. Anyone who tells me I look tired.
3. Anyone who puts a dirty dish in the sink while I'm washing the dishes. (I know, I know, what do I expect them to do? I'm glad you asked. Here are some acceptable alternatives: Wait until I'm finished and then wash it yourself. Wash it in the bathroom. Lick it clean.)
4. My husband on nights that he has a 6:00 pm soccer game.
5. People who comment on the fact that I drink iced coffee in the winter. (Do you drink hot coffee in the summer? That's what I thought.)
6. The weatherman when he uses the words "doozy" or "record-breaking low temps".
7. Waiters when they ask how I'm doing at the exact moment that I take a bite of food. (It's like they get pleasure from the fact that I'm forced to resort to a lame thumbs-up.)
8. Taylor Swift when I can't get "Shake it Off" out of my damn head. (Just kidding, Tay! I would never punch you!)
9. The woman in our baby gym class who named her son "Tash".
10. Me. When I can't stop watching KUWTK.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
To Wash or Not to Wash?
...that is the question that every mom who has a child who is attached to a lovey/blankey/stuffy/wubby of some sort asks herself every few weeks when she realizes that the smell emanating from said lovey/blankey/stuffy/wubby isn't going to go away on its own.
Even before Rory was born, I hoped that she would become attached to something that would bring her comfort during difficult times. I have a stuffed dog that I've had for many years that I take everywhere. It's seen better days, but I still feel the same sense of comfort and security every night when I lay down in bed and rest my head on the soft, worn fabric as I did when I was five years old. I wanted Rory to have something physical that would make her feel safe when she felt anxious or scared and I wasn't around to comfort her.
But you know what they say... be careful what you wish for.
A few weeks after Rory was born, my sister Whitney, offered to buy Rory an animal lovey that she had seen at a local store and have it monogrammed with her name. (I chose the giraffe because it was coming from auntie Whitney, who is super tall with freakishly small feet, like a giraffe.) It arrived a few weeks later, and it was promptly shoved into a drawer in her nursery because let's face it, a five week old can't even find her thumb, let alone form an attachment to an inanimate object.
Fast forward four months when we're in the midst of another sleep regression, and my sleep-deprived self somehow remembers to ask the doctor for sleep advice during one of Rory's wellness visits. She suggests that I put her to sleep with a small lovey (not a blanket, people) in hopes that she will take comfort in the object and use it to help her self-soothe. At that point, I would have tried anything, and who knows if it really worked or if it was just the placebo effect, but that night she seemed to sleep better. And from that day on, "girafa" made an appearance in the crib for every nap and at bedtime each night.
Fast forward another 4 months. Girafa now goes everywhere. I know hyperbole is one of my many gifts, but this is not an exaggeration. She goes to the grocery store, to the park, to the library, and to the gym. She' right next to Rory on the side of the tub at bathtime, and I literally had to pry it out of her hands when we went swimming last week.
The good news is that I have witnessed Girafa bring Rory comfort during rough times, like when we leave her with a sitter or she is having difficulty falling back asleep in the middle of the night. So, she is serving her purpose, I just didn't expect her to become another part of the family. Now when we go out, Girafa takes up the seat next to Rory in the car. She sits next to Rory in her wagon, and she gets poured the first cup of tea at all of our tea parties. And we all must be very quiet whenever Rory randomly decides that girafa is "seeping".
Fine, I can stomach the fact that I'm no longer the favorite, but do you know how hard it is to be in charge of a toddler and a small lovey? I'm constantly on the verge of a panic attack. Where's Rory? Oh, there she is, taking books off the shelves. Oh no! Where is girafa?! Take a breath, retrace you steps. Oh there she is...next to the books about separation anxiety we were looking at earlier.
But that's not even the hardest part. See, Rory has developed a habit of sucking on the corners of her lovey, which means that it constantly smells like spit. And as much as she loves the thing, she's pretty quick to drop it on the floor as soon as she sees something more interesting that requires both hands. (Like tormenting Marli or picking the neighbor's flowers.) So, poor girafa spends a lot of time on the floor and in Rory's mouth.
Which brings me to the original question: to wash or not to wash? To wash means that my germaphobe-self will be satisfied and I can sleep another night without wondering what obscure illness Rory will develop as a result of sucking on a germ-infested lovey. But to wash also means I have to trick my child into giving up her beloved giraffe for the better part of an hour, which is a lot harder than it sounds.
The first time I washed the lovey, I naively thought I could just take it gently from Rory's hands and calmly explain that her giraffe needed a bath and would be ready to play again soon. Rory spent thirty-three minutes sobbing in front of the washer watching her giraffe go around and around.
Now I know better. Now I know that washing Girafa takes planning and calculation. My strategy isn't quite perfect, but give me a few months, and I'm pretty sure I'll be able to work for the CIA. It goes something like this:
1. Offer her her latest food obsession. (This week it's kiwis.)
2. Give it to her in a bowl so that she needs both hands to carry it.
3. Turn on a short Baby Einstein clip.
4. Quickly and Quietly grab Girafa and throw her in the washer. (Set to rapid wash, obviously)
5. When Rory inevitably asks for Girafa before the wash cycle is done, offer her more kiwi.
6. Give the lovey back as soon as the washer stops.
(The dryer, you ask? Ain't nobody got time for that.)
Repeat every 1 to 2 weeks.
Even before Rory was born, I hoped that she would become attached to something that would bring her comfort during difficult times. I have a stuffed dog that I've had for many years that I take everywhere. It's seen better days, but I still feel the same sense of comfort and security every night when I lay down in bed and rest my head on the soft, worn fabric as I did when I was five years old. I wanted Rory to have something physical that would make her feel safe when she felt anxious or scared and I wasn't around to comfort her.
But you know what they say... be careful what you wish for.
A few weeks after Rory was born, my sister Whitney, offered to buy Rory an animal lovey that she had seen at a local store and have it monogrammed with her name. (I chose the giraffe because it was coming from auntie Whitney, who is super tall with freakishly small feet, like a giraffe.) It arrived a few weeks later, and it was promptly shoved into a drawer in her nursery because let's face it, a five week old can't even find her thumb, let alone form an attachment to an inanimate object.
Fast forward four months when we're in the midst of another sleep regression, and my sleep-deprived self somehow remembers to ask the doctor for sleep advice during one of Rory's wellness visits. She suggests that I put her to sleep with a small lovey (not a blanket, people) in hopes that she will take comfort in the object and use it to help her self-soothe. At that point, I would have tried anything, and who knows if it really worked or if it was just the placebo effect, but that night she seemed to sleep better. And from that day on, "girafa" made an appearance in the crib for every nap and at bedtime each night.
Fast forward another 4 months. Girafa now goes everywhere. I know hyperbole is one of my many gifts, but this is not an exaggeration. She goes to the grocery store, to the park, to the library, and to the gym. She' right next to Rory on the side of the tub at bathtime, and I literally had to pry it out of her hands when we went swimming last week.
The good news is that I have witnessed Girafa bring Rory comfort during rough times, like when we leave her with a sitter or she is having difficulty falling back asleep in the middle of the night. So, she is serving her purpose, I just didn't expect her to become another part of the family. Now when we go out, Girafa takes up the seat next to Rory in the car. She sits next to Rory in her wagon, and she gets poured the first cup of tea at all of our tea parties. And we all must be very quiet whenever Rory randomly decides that girafa is "seeping".
Fine, I can stomach the fact that I'm no longer the favorite, but do you know how hard it is to be in charge of a toddler and a small lovey? I'm constantly on the verge of a panic attack. Where's Rory? Oh, there she is, taking books off the shelves. Oh no! Where is girafa?! Take a breath, retrace you steps. Oh there she is...next to the books about separation anxiety we were looking at earlier.
But that's not even the hardest part. See, Rory has developed a habit of sucking on the corners of her lovey, which means that it constantly smells like spit. And as much as she loves the thing, she's pretty quick to drop it on the floor as soon as she sees something more interesting that requires both hands. (Like tormenting Marli or picking the neighbor's flowers.) So, poor girafa spends a lot of time on the floor and in Rory's mouth.
Which brings me to the original question: to wash or not to wash? To wash means that my germaphobe-self will be satisfied and I can sleep another night without wondering what obscure illness Rory will develop as a result of sucking on a germ-infested lovey. But to wash also means I have to trick my child into giving up her beloved giraffe for the better part of an hour, which is a lot harder than it sounds.
The first time I washed the lovey, I naively thought I could just take it gently from Rory's hands and calmly explain that her giraffe needed a bath and would be ready to play again soon. Rory spent thirty-three minutes sobbing in front of the washer watching her giraffe go around and around.
Now I know better. Now I know that washing Girafa takes planning and calculation. My strategy isn't quite perfect, but give me a few months, and I'm pretty sure I'll be able to work for the CIA. It goes something like this:
1. Offer her her latest food obsession. (This week it's kiwis.)
2. Give it to her in a bowl so that she needs both hands to carry it.
3. Turn on a short Baby Einstein clip.
4. Quickly and Quietly grab Girafa and throw her in the washer. (Set to rapid wash, obviously)
5. When Rory inevitably asks for Girafa before the wash cycle is done, offer her more kiwi.
6. Give the lovey back as soon as the washer stops.
(The dryer, you ask? Ain't nobody got time for that.)
Repeat every 1 to 2 weeks.
 |
| The famous "Girafa". |
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| Yes, that would be my phone number written in permanent ink on the tag. |
Friday, February 6, 2015
Things That Don't Matter When Your Baby is Having An Allergic Reaction
1. Leaving story time before it starts
2. Obeying the speed limit
3. Red Benadryl on a white carpet
4. Parking in a handicap spot without a permit
5. Leaving your purse in an unlocked car
6. Crying in front of the doctor
7. Getting thrown up on
8. Natural remedies
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Cream Cheese and Dog Hair
Few things annoy me more than seeing this in someone's home:
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| Who the hell is Mary Randolph Carter, anyway? |
Or this:
Or this:
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| Seriously? |
I know at least five people who have similar signs in their house, and every time I see them I want to rip them down and use them to sweep up all the dust on the floor. I understand that not everyone can be Martha Stewart, but why in the world would you call attention to this fact by plastering it on your wall?
Not only is it tacky, but it doesn't make any sense. Cleaning your house is a waste of time? In order for a house to be lived in, it must be messy? If my laundry is done and my kitchen is clean, my kids are unhappy?
I grew up in a family of six children, and our house was practically spotless. Seriously, my mom can spot a dust bunny from a mile away. (Whitney- remember the piece of string?) Maybe that's why I believe in the importance of a clean, organized home. I do crazy things like vacuum, and dust the baseboards, and wipe the counters several times a day. I clean the bathrooms once a week, and I wash our sheets and towels on a regular basis. When Rory is finished playing, we (okay I) clean up before leaving the room. Books belong on shelves, clothes belong in drawers, and toys belong in baskets.
I can imagine that cleaning and organizing must be especially challenging for working moms, and if it comes down to cleaning or spending time with your children, then by all means, spend your free time playing and reading with your children. And then once they're asleep, you can clean. This may sound extreme, but I just don't think there is any excuse to have a dirty house. In the past month, I've been to one house with dried cream cheese smeared all over the kitchen table and sliding glass door, and another with what must have been the equivalent of two pounds of dog hair on the hardwood floor. (This woman has a crawling baby, by the way.)
I know moms should be building each other up, and I don't want to sound judgmental, but I did judge these moms. I couldn't help it. Being in these houses made me feel uncomfortable and anxioius, especially with Rory walking around and putting everything in her mouth. Contrary to the popular wall art pictured above, I didn't feel happier or more alive.
I read a blog post a few years ago written by a mom, who in a nutshell said that if people expected her to clean up before they came over, they weren't welcome at her house. Um, excuse me? I clean my house as a sign of respect to my friends and family because I want them to feel welcome and comfortable.
I read a blog post a few years ago written by a mom, who in a nutshell said that if people expected her to clean up before they came over, they weren't welcome at her house. Um, excuse me? I clean my house as a sign of respect to my friends and family because I want them to feel welcome and comfortable.
Now I'm not saying that my house is never messy. The basement playroom often looks like someone emptied every toy basket just for fun. (Because that's exactly what happened.) And more often than not, there is flour or coffee grinds on the kitchen counter, but it gets cleaned up. Not eventually, not the next day, but soon after. When Rory is engrossed in independent play or eating breakfast or napping, I take a few minutes to clean. Does this make me a bad mom? Perhaps. But Rory will never be embarrassed to bring friends over. She will go to sleep on clean sheets every night, and she will never have to wear dirty clothes to school.
So does keeping a clean, organized home make me a better mom? Absolutely not. That's my point...it has no reflection on how happy my daughter is or how well my time is spent, and it certainly doesn't mean that our home isn't lived in.
It simply means that my house is cleaner than yours.
It simply means that my house is cleaner than yours.
Thursday, January 29, 2015
Three Things Thursday
1. My Bath Toy PSA
I decided it was about time to clean our bath toys about two months ago, so naturally I just got around to doing it yesterday. I sprayed down the toys with a vinegar/EO mixture and laid them out to dry, but when I went to collect them a few hours later, I noticed that the octopus was leaking some strange-looking residue. Upon closer inspection, I realized that the black flakes protruding from the hole (that sounds really gross) was black mold! I cut it open and saw this:
I did some reading, and apparently this is a common problem with bath toys that have holes, which makes sense. Water gets inside, and unless you're diligent about emptying each squirty toy after every bath, they're going to be constantly moist (ew), which is the perfect environment for mold and mildew. So, if you have any bath toys that squirt water, you should probably check them for mold. Rory loved her collection of squirty animals that Tio Paulo bought her when we visited him in San Francisco, but they are probably laying on the bottom of the sea now, where they belong. (I threw them away.) One of the blogs I read suggested hot gluing the holes closed before using the toys (ain't nobody got time for that), but instead I'll probably just give her some measuring cups and spoons to play with in the bath from now on.
2. Molars
Up until last week, I often bragged about the fact that Rory was a good teether. What does that even mean? It means that besides a little extra drool, I never knew she was getting a tooth until it actually appeared in her mouth. She was never fussy, and cutting teeth just didn't seem to bother her. Well, apparently molars are a different story. She's been crying out in the middle of the night, super clingy, and refusing to eat some foods because her mouth is so sore. A few days ago she looked at me, touched her cheek, and said, "ow!". I feel awful because there's really nothing I can do except try to distract her. (There have been a lot of "Shake it Off" dance parties lately. Like, more than usual.) And that's not even the worst part....we have 6 more molars to go.
3. This is why we moved do Denver.
That's right, we had two 70+ degree days this week. In January. Rory and I spent as much time as possible outside, because as you can see, it didn't last long. The weather here is so up and down that I don't even mind when it snows...I know it won't be long until we get some nicer weather. Although, I should probably mention that it snowed several inches on Mother's Day last year.
I decided it was about time to clean our bath toys about two months ago, so naturally I just got around to doing it yesterday. I sprayed down the toys with a vinegar/EO mixture and laid them out to dry, but when I went to collect them a few hours later, I noticed that the octopus was leaking some strange-looking residue. Upon closer inspection, I realized that the black flakes protruding from the hole (that sounds really gross) was black mold! I cut it open and saw this:
 |
| Nasty. |
I did some reading, and apparently this is a common problem with bath toys that have holes, which makes sense. Water gets inside, and unless you're diligent about emptying each squirty toy after every bath, they're going to be constantly moist (ew), which is the perfect environment for mold and mildew. So, if you have any bath toys that squirt water, you should probably check them for mold. Rory loved her collection of squirty animals that Tio Paulo bought her when we visited him in San Francisco, but they are probably laying on the bottom of the sea now, where they belong. (I threw them away.) One of the blogs I read suggested hot gluing the holes closed before using the toys (ain't nobody got time for that), but instead I'll probably just give her some measuring cups and spoons to play with in the bath from now on.
2. Molars
Up until last week, I often bragged about the fact that Rory was a good teether. What does that even mean? It means that besides a little extra drool, I never knew she was getting a tooth until it actually appeared in her mouth. She was never fussy, and cutting teeth just didn't seem to bother her. Well, apparently molars are a different story. She's been crying out in the middle of the night, super clingy, and refusing to eat some foods because her mouth is so sore. A few days ago she looked at me, touched her cheek, and said, "ow!". I feel awful because there's really nothing I can do except try to distract her. (There have been a lot of "Shake it Off" dance parties lately. Like, more than usual.) And that's not even the worst part....we have 6 more molars to go.
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| Rory isn't sleeping well at night, apparently. |
3. This is why we moved do Denver.
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| Aren't people who take screenshots of the weather forecast so annoying? |
That's right, we had two 70+ degree days this week. In January. Rory and I spent as much time as possible outside, because as you can see, it didn't last long. The weather here is so up and down that I don't even mind when it snows...I know it won't be long until we get some nicer weather. Although, I should probably mention that it snowed several inches on Mother's Day last year.
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| I love that she knows what it means to smile now. Makes picture-taking so much easier. |
Monday, January 26, 2015
Oriental
The following conversation occurred between me and a cashier at a local shop specializing in gently used clothing and furniture. *
Cashier: Your daughter is beautiful. What's her name?
Me: Thank you! This is Rory.
Rory (pointing to herself): "Ory."
Cashier (Ringing up Rory's new $6 REI down coat): Rory...that's interesting.
Me: Um, thanks. It's Irish.
Cashier: So, is she adopted or something?
Me: Uh, no. She just looks nothing like me. Her dad is Japanese.
Cashier: Oh, wow. You don't see very many mixed Oriental kids.
Me (grabbing my bag of "new to me" purchases): No, I guess you don't. And actually her dad is Brazilian.
Cashier: ...
Me: Nevermind. Have a good day.
*Okay fine, we were at Goodwill. Again.
Cashier: Your daughter is beautiful. What's her name?
Me: Thank you! This is Rory.
Rory (pointing to herself): "Ory."
Cashier (Ringing up Rory's new $6 REI down coat): Rory...that's interesting.
Me: Um, thanks. It's Irish.
Cashier: So, is she adopted or something?
Me: Uh, no. She just looks nothing like me. Her dad is Japanese.
Cashier: Oh, wow. You don't see very many mixed Oriental kids.
Me (grabbing my bag of "new to me" purchases): No, I guess you don't. And actually her dad is Brazilian.
Cashier: ...
Me: Nevermind. Have a good day.
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| My mixed Oriental kid making Brazilian brigadeiros. |
*Okay fine, we were at Goodwill. Again.
Friday, January 16, 2015
Why I'm Anal About Naptime
Yesterday I was painfully reminded of why I never go anywhere close to nap time. Rory recently transitioned to one nap a day, which means she sleeps from about 1230-200 on most afternoons. This makes planning our morning outings much easier, but also kind of tricky. If we happen to be driving anywhere after 11:30, it's pretty much a sure thing that she'll fall asleep in the car, and I've never been good at the car-crib transfer.
It's our fault that Rory only naps well in her crib. At around 4 months it became apparent that she was out of the infant "I can sleep anywhere" phase. Sounds she used to be able to sleep through, like Marli barking or the washing machine running, began to wake her up. So, we started "sleep training", and she quickly became accustomed to a dark, quiet room, so now it's difficult for her to fall and stay asleep anywhere but her crib.
But yesterday I was feeling brave and decided to go to Costco after meeting a friend for coffee. Sure enough, Rory fell asleep on the way. Luckily she's still small enough to be in the infant carseat, so I was able to just put her into the shopping cart asleep, and I thought I was going to make it out of the store with a sleeping baby, but she woke up as soon as I started piling my things onto the conveyor belt. I tried putting her down again once we got home, but she was convinced that a 43 minute nap was all she needed for the day....which brings me to my point. (Finally.)
Forty-three minutes. From 6:30 am yesterday morning to 7:30 pm last night, I got exactly 43 minutes of peace and quiet. (Although dodging other carts in Costco while trying not to wake a sleeping baby is really anything but relaxing.) Forty-three minutes in thirteen hours. A mere three quarters of an hour that I didn't have to sing "The Wheels on the Bus", or pretend to be fascinated by yet another dead leaf, or calm a screaming toddler who is convinced I am hiding bananas in the pantry when really she ate the last one for breakfast.
And yes, I realize that these things are all in my job description as a stay-at-home-mom, and yes, I realize how fortunate I am to stay home with my daughter, but I want you to think for a minute about people who go to work in offices everyday. I believe an hour for a lunch break is standard. Well, that's 17 more minutes than I got yesterday. And then there's the commute to work. Assuming it's child free, do you know how much I would love a 30 minute solo commute to work everyday? That would mean 60 whole minutes of listening to whatever radio station I wanted. One hour I wouldn't have to hear Rory scream "Mama!" over and over again just for fun. I would give my right arm for one hour of mindless driving everyday. To better help those of you who are not mothers understand my point, imagine that your lunch break was suddenly taken away. Or better yet, imagine that you still had a lunch break, but you had to eat in a preschool classroom next to a child who wants to try everything you're eating, and then promptly spits it out. Back onto your plate. That's what it's like to be a SAHM with a kid who misses her nap.
Instead of a lunch break or a commute, moms get nap time. I believe that I speak for all moms when I say that we live and breath for nap time. Nap time is sacred. It is often the only break we get all day. It is when I check my email, browse Pinterest, eat lunch, do laundry, or watch crappy daytime TV. It is when I schedule doctor's appointments, clean the bathroom, and pay pills. Without nap time, my house would be disgusting, no one would have anything to wear, and I wouldn't know what Mila and Ashton named their baby.
So, please don't look at me like I'm a lunatic when I tell you that we can't meet you for lunch at noon because of Rory's nap schedule. And don't make me feel crazy for putting a sign on my door asking people not to ring the doorbell. Unless, of course, you want to come to my house and spend time with my daughter on a day when she has missed her nap. Once you're here, I'll be sure to take my hour lunch break.
But yesterday I was feeling brave and decided to go to Costco after meeting a friend for coffee. Sure enough, Rory fell asleep on the way. Luckily she's still small enough to be in the infant carseat, so I was able to just put her into the shopping cart asleep, and I thought I was going to make it out of the store with a sleeping baby, but she woke up as soon as I started piling my things onto the conveyor belt. I tried putting her down again once we got home, but she was convinced that a 43 minute nap was all she needed for the day....which brings me to my point. (Finally.)
Forty-three minutes. From 6:30 am yesterday morning to 7:30 pm last night, I got exactly 43 minutes of peace and quiet. (Although dodging other carts in Costco while trying not to wake a sleeping baby is really anything but relaxing.) Forty-three minutes in thirteen hours. A mere three quarters of an hour that I didn't have to sing "The Wheels on the Bus", or pretend to be fascinated by yet another dead leaf, or calm a screaming toddler who is convinced I am hiding bananas in the pantry when really she ate the last one for breakfast.
And yes, I realize that these things are all in my job description as a stay-at-home-mom, and yes, I realize how fortunate I am to stay home with my daughter, but I want you to think for a minute about people who go to work in offices everyday. I believe an hour for a lunch break is standard. Well, that's 17 more minutes than I got yesterday. And then there's the commute to work. Assuming it's child free, do you know how much I would love a 30 minute solo commute to work everyday? That would mean 60 whole minutes of listening to whatever radio station I wanted. One hour I wouldn't have to hear Rory scream "Mama!" over and over again just for fun. I would give my right arm for one hour of mindless driving everyday. To better help those of you who are not mothers understand my point, imagine that your lunch break was suddenly taken away. Or better yet, imagine that you still had a lunch break, but you had to eat in a preschool classroom next to a child who wants to try everything you're eating, and then promptly spits it out. Back onto your plate. That's what it's like to be a SAHM with a kid who misses her nap.
Instead of a lunch break or a commute, moms get nap time. I believe that I speak for all moms when I say that we live and breath for nap time. Nap time is sacred. It is often the only break we get all day. It is when I check my email, browse Pinterest, eat lunch, do laundry, or watch crappy daytime TV. It is when I schedule doctor's appointments, clean the bathroom, and pay pills. Without nap time, my house would be disgusting, no one would have anything to wear, and I wouldn't know what Mila and Ashton named their baby.
So, please don't look at me like I'm a lunatic when I tell you that we can't meet you for lunch at noon because of Rory's nap schedule. And don't make me feel crazy for putting a sign on my door asking people not to ring the doorbell. Unless, of course, you want to come to my house and spend time with my daughter on a day when she has missed her nap. Once you're here, I'll be sure to take my hour lunch break.
Thursday, January 15, 2015
A List of Things I Would Never Know if I Didn't Have a 14-Month-Old
1. A "sensory table" is really just another place to put your trash.
2. That I would ever consider this a masterpiece.
3. Minutes can seem like hours, but months can seem like days.
4. Sometimes you just need to dance. At the grocery store. In the cereal aisle. (Beyonce gets me every time, too.)
5. Hearing your child say "mama" can be both the sweetest and the most annoying sound in the world.
6. Unrolling a toilet paper roll is clearly more exciting than a room full of toys.
7. Never say the word "banana" after you've brushed your baby's teeth.
8. Choosing a few pictures from the past year to print and frame turns into a two hour event. Complete with laughter and tears.
9. It is possible (although perhaps not normal) for a 14-month-old to become infatuated with goats and gorillas. Thank God for youtube.
10. Zucchini and carrots belong on the floor.
2. That I would ever consider this a masterpiece.
3. Minutes can seem like hours, but months can seem like days.
4. Sometimes you just need to dance. At the grocery store. In the cereal aisle. (Beyonce gets me every time, too.)
5. Hearing your child say "mama" can be both the sweetest and the most annoying sound in the world.
6. Unrolling a toilet paper roll is clearly more exciting than a room full of toys.
7. Never say the word "banana" after you've brushed your baby's teeth.
8. Choosing a few pictures from the past year to print and frame turns into a two hour event. Complete with laughter and tears.
9. It is possible (although perhaps not normal) for a 14-month-old to become infatuated with goats and gorillas. Thank God for youtube.
10. Zucchini and carrots belong on the floor.
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| She ate the berries, though. |
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
On Discipline
How is it possible that I'm already writing a blog post on discipline? Rory just turned 14 months old, and I'm already struggling with the idea of age-appropriate discipline. She's engaging in completely normal toddler behaviors: telling me "no", doing the exact thing I tell her not to, taking toys from other children, and throwing the occasional fit when she's tired/unhappy. I realize that at this age the best offense is a good defense (enough with the sport analogies!), meaning prevention is key. I don't take her anywhere within an hour of her naptime/bedtime, and I redirect when I notice her engaging in a potentially dangerous or inappropriate activity. But I know there will be times when this isn't possible, and so the time has come for Marcos and I to decide on a parenting/discipline philosophy that we feel good about. I checked out a few discipline books from the library, including Love and Logic and Positive Discipline, and just like all of the research I did concerning sleep training, I am taking bits and pieces from each philosophy and forming my own discipline style that meshes with our values and lifestyle.
One things is for certain: I will not spank or use any other form of physical punishment. I understand that some parents feel as though this is an effective form of discipline, and maybe it works for them, but I believe that the ultimate goal of any form of discipline is to promote self-control and build self-confidence so that children will grow up to make good choices and become productive members of society. The purpose of discipline is to teach, not to punish. I don't understand how hitting a child really teaches them a valuable lesson, other than you are someone who should be feared rather than respected. And hitting a child for hurting someone is the ultimate form of hypocrisy and really only communicates to your child that you've lost control and don't know how to handle the situation. I would be lying if I said that I didn't judge parents who spank just a little.
Okay, we get it, you don't agree with spanking. So then how do you plan on disciplining your child?
Yeah, I'm not entirely sure yet.
Based on my reading and my experience working with young children, I know that effective discipline must be based on mutual respect. The old adage is true: You must give respect to get respect. You respect your friends and your coworkers and the checkout lady at the grocery store...why wouldn't you respect your own child? Respect means being honest and kind and empathetic. Respect doesn't mean rolling your eyes, tricking your child, or saying, "because I said so". All of this may sound obvious, but when you're frustrated and angry, using kind words can be a struggle.
I believe in respect, but I also believe in tough love and boundaries. I think that you're doing your child a great disservice if you refuse to establish rules or execute consequences. Love and Logic is a great resource for "natural consequences". These are consequences that occur naturally as a result of a specific choice or behavior. If a child refuses to eat the dinner you made, allow them to go to bed hungry. They will naturally learn on their own that they must eat what you make or they will feel hungry and uncomfortable. (I don't sending a child to bed without dinner is in any way abusive because the child made the choice not to eat.) If a child cannot get ready for school in time, pack their clothes in a bag and put them in the car in their pajamas. Again, they will learn quickly that when you say "five more minutes", you mean it. For younger children, if they continue to hit the dog with a toy, you take the toy away.And the best part of instituting natural consequences is that it takes the thinking out of it for parents. You don't have to brainstorm creative punishments or resort to yelling.
Of course, there are instances when natural consequences just won't work, and this is when things get tricky. What do I do when Rory runs out into the street after I've told her not to? The natural consequence for this behavior is not one I'm willing to let happen. Children are unpredictable, therefore it's pretty much impossible to be 100 percent prepared for every parenting situation you will find yourself in for the next 18 plus years. (Of course, there are some givens: drawing on the walls, climbing on furniture, burping at the dinner table...) I think the trick is to spend time thinking about what kind of parent you want to be and what kind of adults you want your children to become. Parenting and disciplining is like anything else...it takes a lot of practice to become an expert. Fortunately, children are very forgiving, if not forgetful.
Here are some points I think are important when it comes to disciplining:
Here are some points I think are important when it comes to disciplining:
- Speak in a calm voice. Children tend to tune out yelling and become defensive when their parents raise their voices. A calm voice communicates to your child that you have your emotions under control. (Even if you're fuming inside.
- Use timeout as an opportunity to reflect and gain control (for both parent and child) rather than a punishment. Ask your child: Would you like to take a break in your room?
- Provide children with opportunities to be in control as often as possible. Love and Logic is big on this concept. The theory behind it is that if children feel as though they are able to make choices, they won't resist being told what to do. (Choices can be as basic as: Would you like to wear the red shirt or the green? Would you like to go to bed now or in five minutes?)
- Don't make empty threats. How many of us remember our parents saying "If you don't stop fighting, I'm going to turn this car around!"? Did it ever happen? Of course not. And we knew it wouldn't. Instead, you can say something like, "I don't bring fighting children to the playground." This is something you can easily follow through with.
- Make sure your discipline techniques are developmentally appropriate. You can't expect a 15 month old to clean up her toys without some help and guidance. (But you can certainly start practicing this skill as early as possible.) Rory still puts everything in her mouth, and it drives me crazy, but I understand that at her age it's how she learns about the world.
- Be prepared for your routine to be disrupted, especially in the beginning. Children will test you; it's both normal and healthy for them to do so. In fact, in the beginning stages of establishing your discipline routine, you almost want them to misbehave so that you can show them you mean business. If you go to the pool and they continue to run when you've told them they must walk, pack up and leave, even if you've only been there for five minutes.
- It's okay to delay consequences. If you're not sure how to handle a situation or you're too angry to do it effectively and appropriately, tell your child that there will be a consequence and you'll discuss it later.
- Involve your children in their own consequences. (This is another Love and Logic concept.) If you're child draws on the wall, you may say something like, "Oh no. Crayons are for paper only. How are you going to solve this problem?" If the child doesn't suggest something, you may say, "Would you like an idea? Mommy has a sponge and spray that can be used to clean it. I'll show you where it is." This communicate to children that they are smart enough to solve their own problems.
- Shower your children with love, praise, and affection. Kids need to be touched and told how wonderful they are. Don't dish out praise for anything and everything, and use specific praise whenever possible, but if they did something well or you're proud of them, let them know. And I've never heard a parent say, "I wish I had hugged my children a little less."
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| It's hard to believe that this cutie could ever do anything wrong... |
Monday, January 12, 2015
A Few of Our Favorite Things
Rory's Picks
1. Freshly Picked Moccasins
I've been obsessed with these mocs ever since I saw the owner on Shark Tank last year, but I couldn't bring myself to spend the $60, especially since baby feet grow so quickly. Fortunately for me, I have a very generous friend (thanks, Lu!) who bought Rory a pair during one of their flash sales. They're all leather, super soft, durable, and best of all...made in the USA! Rory often complains about wearing shoes, but she doesn't seem to mind wearing these. They're so soft and stretchy, I don't even think she realizes she has them on. There are loads of colors and sizes to choose from...Rory also has a pair of Freshly Picked pineapple mocs that I can't wait for her to fit into. If you follow the company on Instagram, you'll be notified of their flash sales, which make them slightly more affordable.
2. Sensory Table
Ever since we came home from Mexico, I've been wanting to build Rory a sand table. She really enjoyed playing in the sand in Mexico, and as a teacher, I know how beneficial sensory play is. So last week, I dragged Rory to Home Depot where Nick in the lumber department helped me choose the right wood and then cut each piece to size so that all Marcos had to do was drill the pieces into place. It turned out great, but unfortunately, it's too cold to fill with sand and put outside. Luckily we had some extra pasta in the house that Rory seems to think is just as entertaining. During the winter months I plan to fill the bin with things like corn, cotton balls, rice, and anything else that I happen to find on Pinterest.
3. Saying "No"
I'm sure everyone but Rory would agree that this one is self-explanatory.
Lindsey's Picks
1. livesimply.com
This blog is like porn for hippes, y'all. I mean, this woman makes her own (all-natural) hand sanitizer and laundry detergent, for crying out loud. (I've already ordered the ingredients for both.) I also like her approach to meal planning using whole foods, and she has lots of ideas for homemade gifts. (I apologize in advance to whoever is at the receiving end of my attempt at these homemade gifts.) Her posts are funny, reader-friendly, and full of gorgeous photographs. I'm most excited to try the homemade apple pop-tarts and all natural sunscreen.
2. Chick-Fil-A Fridays
I have a confession to make: I eat fast food. As much as I pride myself in eating whole, unprocessed foods, I cannot resist Chick-Fil-A. Maybe it's the waffle fries or the combination of honey mustard sauce and delicious chicken, but I'm pretty sure a chicken nugget meal from Chick-Fil-A is what heaven tastes like. I'm not sure when or why it started, but for a few months now, Marcos and I have deemed Fridays Chick-Fil-A night. I was a vegetarian for five years, so maybe I'm just making up for lost time. As soon as Rory is down, Marcos goes through the CFA drive through, and upon his return, we feast on trans fats and wash it down with carbonated poison. It's really the only time throughout the week that I allow myself to eat anything processed or fried, so I don't even feel that badly about it. I swear. I don't.
3. Homemade Tortillas
I hate that the tortillas from the grocery store are full of ingredients I can't pronounce and definitely don't sound like anything I should be ingesting. Yesterday I had a craving for black bean enchiladas, but I didn't have the time or energy to run to Whole Foods to buy the all-natural tortillas, so I decided to make my own. It was one of the easiest things I've done, and they tasted amazing. They had exactly four ingredients: flour, water, baking powder, and oil. (One of the reviewers even said that it's possible to omit the oil.) Rory had fun "helping" me with the dough, and she was a big fan of the finished product, too. Here is the link to the recipe I used. I'll probably double it next time and freeze some.
1. Freshly Picked Moccasins
I've been obsessed with these mocs ever since I saw the owner on Shark Tank last year, but I couldn't bring myself to spend the $60, especially since baby feet grow so quickly. Fortunately for me, I have a very generous friend (thanks, Lu!) who bought Rory a pair during one of their flash sales. They're all leather, super soft, durable, and best of all...made in the USA! Rory often complains about wearing shoes, but she doesn't seem to mind wearing these. They're so soft and stretchy, I don't even think she realizes she has them on. There are loads of colors and sizes to choose from...Rory also has a pair of Freshly Picked pineapple mocs that I can't wait for her to fit into. If you follow the company on Instagram, you'll be notified of their flash sales, which make them slightly more affordable.
 |
| Freshly Picked Moccasins in blush. |
2. Sensory Table
Ever since we came home from Mexico, I've been wanting to build Rory a sand table. She really enjoyed playing in the sand in Mexico, and as a teacher, I know how beneficial sensory play is. So last week, I dragged Rory to Home Depot where Nick in the lumber department helped me choose the right wood and then cut each piece to size so that all Marcos had to do was drill the pieces into place. It turned out great, but unfortunately, it's too cold to fill with sand and put outside. Luckily we had some extra pasta in the house that Rory seems to think is just as entertaining. During the winter months I plan to fill the bin with things like corn, cotton balls, rice, and anything else that I happen to find on Pinterest.
 |
| She's not quite tall enough to reach it on her own. |
 |
| Cheap entertainment at its finest. |
3. Saying "No"
I'm sure everyone but Rory would agree that this one is self-explanatory.
Lindsey's Picks
1. livesimply.com
This blog is like porn for hippes, y'all. I mean, this woman makes her own (all-natural) hand sanitizer and laundry detergent, for crying out loud. (I've already ordered the ingredients for both.) I also like her approach to meal planning using whole foods, and she has lots of ideas for homemade gifts. (I apologize in advance to whoever is at the receiving end of my attempt at these homemade gifts.) Her posts are funny, reader-friendly, and full of gorgeous photographs. I'm most excited to try the homemade apple pop-tarts and all natural sunscreen.
 |
| Homemade Sunscreen: How hard can it be? |
2. Chick-Fil-A Fridays
I have a confession to make: I eat fast food. As much as I pride myself in eating whole, unprocessed foods, I cannot resist Chick-Fil-A. Maybe it's the waffle fries or the combination of honey mustard sauce and delicious chicken, but I'm pretty sure a chicken nugget meal from Chick-Fil-A is what heaven tastes like. I'm not sure when or why it started, but for a few months now, Marcos and I have deemed Fridays Chick-Fil-A night. I was a vegetarian for five years, so maybe I'm just making up for lost time. As soon as Rory is down, Marcos goes through the CFA drive through, and upon his return, we feast on trans fats and wash it down with carbonated poison. It's really the only time throughout the week that I allow myself to eat anything processed or fried, so I don't even feel that badly about it. I swear. I don't.
 |
| If you insist. |
3. Homemade Tortillas
I hate that the tortillas from the grocery store are full of ingredients I can't pronounce and definitely don't sound like anything I should be ingesting. Yesterday I had a craving for black bean enchiladas, but I didn't have the time or energy to run to Whole Foods to buy the all-natural tortillas, so I decided to make my own. It was one of the easiest things I've done, and they tasted amazing. They had exactly four ingredients: flour, water, baking powder, and oil. (One of the reviewers even said that it's possible to omit the oil.) Rory had fun "helping" me with the dough, and she was a big fan of the finished product, too. Here is the link to the recipe I used. I'll probably double it next time and freeze some.
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| Cheese! |
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| I'm wearing pajama bottoms, too. Don't judge me. |
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| Flour-faced. |
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
30 Things Rory Should Know About Me: Part 10 and 11
#10. Describe Your Most Embarrassing Moment
Rory,
When mommy was in college (after I turned 21), I liked to go out with my friends and havetoo many a few drinks. Sometimes I thought my Irish ancestry made me invincible to the effects of alcohol, and I would drink too much. On one of these occasions, your Aunt Katie and I had the brilliant idea to drink cheap tequila before we went out to the bars...where we continued to drink cheap tequila and vodka and rum. The night ended with your aunt Katie passed out under a truck and with Mommy in handcuffs. It was very embarrassing and we are lucky that no one was hurt or arrested. Maybe one day I will fill you in on the details (what I can remember, at least), but for now, that's all you need to know. The moral of this story is obviously that tequila is never a good idea. Remember that.
#11. Describe 10 Pet Peeves You Have
Seriously? Only 10?
1. When people bite the bottom of their ice cream cone and suck the ice cream from the bottom. (Why?!)
2. When I let someone over and they don't wave.
3. When people don't buy off the registry.
4. Popped collars.
5. Facebook game invites.
6. People who use the express lane at the grocery store when they clearly have over 15 items.
7. People who don't share their baby names.
8. People who ask if you're "for sale" when we're out shopping. (You'd be surprised at how often this happens. Granted, we're usually at Goodwill, but still.)
9. The gym in January.
10. Chain emails.
Rory,
When mommy was in college (after I turned 21), I liked to go out with my friends and have
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| Out with Aunt Shannon and Aunt Katie during our junior year of college. |
Seriously? Only 10?
1. When people bite the bottom of their ice cream cone and suck the ice cream from the bottom. (Why?!)
2. When I let someone over and they don't wave.
3. When people don't buy off the registry.
4. Popped collars.
5. Facebook game invites.
6. People who use the express lane at the grocery store when they clearly have over 15 items.
7. People who don't share their baby names.
8. People who ask if you're "for sale" when we're out shopping. (You'd be surprised at how often this happens. Granted, we're usually at Goodwill, but still.)
9. The gym in January.
10. Chain emails.
Monday, January 5, 2015
How to Avoid Mom Guilt
Every mom, whether she stays home or works full-time has felt her fair share of "mom guilt". You always feel like you could be doing more to stimulate their development (not that watching Real Housewives marathons isn't educational) or increase their exposure to music/literature/other cultures. Social media only increases our anxiety. Momblogs and websites like Pinterest have us asking ourselves questions like, "Should I be using gluten-free, organic ingredients to make my kids sandwiches that look like Frozen characters?" and "What the hell is a museum scavenger hunt?!"
But then I think back on my childhood, (full of Little Debbies and episodes of All My Children), and I realize that not every single second of every single day needs to be filled with meaningful learning experiences. It's okay (some would argue it's beneficial) for your child to be bored (gasp!) every once in a while so that you can do the dishes or call the cable guy, and your child can be left to her own devices. Have you ever heard the phrase, "boredom is the mother of invention"? (I'm still waiting for Rory to invent something useful.) Of course, I'm not suggesting you lock your baby in a room so that you can drink wine with the neighbor and shop online, but don't beat yourself up if you're not using baby flashcards or you've been dragging your baby around on errands all day. Stop feeling guilty that you're 15 month old doesn't know her letter sounds, and instead focus on enjoying being a mom. I've learned that anything can be turned into a learning opportunity, which is how I've (mostly) avoided mom guilt. Here are a few of my favorite ways to incorporate learning into our daily routine.
Talk to Your Kid
Let's start with the basics, people. My last few years of teaching, about 40% of my class saw the school SLP for some sort of speech/language disorder, and I am convinced that this alarming number is due to the fact that parents aren't talking to their children anymore. Harried lifestyles are mostly to blame. People are too busy to take the time to teach their children basic conversational skills. Young children spend way too much time in front of the TV or on electronic devices, which means they spend less time conversing. From the day we brought Rory home from the hospital, I vowed to talk to her as much as possible. Obviously we don't have deep conversations about her thoughts on immigration reform, but if she's next to me while I'm folding laundry, I name each item I'm folding and it's color. If I'm cooking in the kitchen, I describe to her what I'm doing and name the foods or utensils I'm using. Most of the time she just babbles back or listens, but lately she's been repeating many of my words. It's a simple thing that makes a big difference.
Red Light Nursery Rhymes
I remember reading in one of my early literacy books in college that if your child enters kindergarten and can recite at least three classic nursery rhymes, he or she is likely to be a successful reader. I believe the correlation is based on the fact that if your child is familiar with nursery rhymes, they were probably read to often from a young age, and we all know the benefits of reading to children from the time they are born. Plus, nursery rhymes have a rhythm and often rhyme, which introduces children to the concepts of phonemes and fluency. So, every time we're in the car and we stop at a red light, I make sure to recite a few nursery rhymes. (Baa Baa Black Sheep, Hickory Dickory Dock, Jack and Jill, etc.)
Spice Cabinets and Bathroom Drawers
Rory, like every other baby on this planet, loves going through cabinets and drawers. She is pretty much obsessed with the spice cabinet. She picks up each container, smells it, shakes it, and rolls it. She can't get enough. Most of the time I'm next to her while she explores the spices, so I'll take the lid off and let her smell it, and sometimes even taste it. (If it's safe.) Her other favorite storage spaces are our bathroom drawers. In the mornings while I get ready, or while I'm cleaning the bathroom, she opens the drawers, takes everything out, carefully examines each piece, and then hands it to me. (Thank you for this half-empty, travel-size shampoo bottle!) We haven't put child locks on many cabinets in the house. Instead, I make sure to fill the cabinets and drawers that are at her level with things that are safe for her to explore. It doesn't make a difference to me if she plays with the Tupperware lids or my make-up brushes, but she seems to enjoy it, and more importantly, exploring these random items is engaging all of her senses and helping her learn more about her world.
Just Say Yes
Once Rory became mobile, I found myself constantly redirecting or telling her "no". But when I reflected on why I was denying her access to things or activities she wanted, I realized that 75% of the time it wasn't for her safety, but rather because I just didn't feel like doing the requested activity. As I teacher I know that the best learning happens when children are interested and actively engaged, so why not take her cue and allow her to do what she wants as long as it doesn't pose any danger for herself or anyone else? Since having this epiphany, I've made an effort to say "yes" whenever possible. Sure, allowing her to feed herself applesauce is messier and more time consuming, but so what? Using a spoon helps with her hand-eye coordination as well as her self-confidence. Going outside and playing in the rocks when it's 35 degrees out may not be my idea of a good time, but Rory loves feeling the different textures and experimenting with how far she can throw them.
I'm not spoiling my child...I don't say "yes" to staying up late or eating cookies or climbing on the coffee table. Children are constantly being told what to do and how to behave; I imagine it must feel nice to be in control every once in awhile. And I've discovered that the more I say yes, the more powerful my "no" has become. When you're constantly saying no, it loses it's meaning and becomes background noise. I save my "no's" for times when we're running late or something isn't safe or I just really don't feel like singing the ABC song for the 30th time.
When all else fails...read a book
There are times when all I want to do is turn on Baby Genius and get ten minutes of peace and quiet to check my email while Rory zones out to the sounds of children singing "Do You Know the Muffin Man", but I try to resist the urge and read her a book instead. Whenever I feel as though I've run out of options for entertaining her, I break out our latest stack of books from the library and read her a few books. Watching me read is helping Rory build a foundation for literacy success. She is learning that books contains pictures and words, that we read from left to right, and she's hearing new vocabulary. She loves to see other babies or book characters doing things she can relate to: playing at the park, eating different foods, or taking a bath. Reading is one of the primary ways that babies make connections. We read before nap time and bed time everyday, and usually several times in between. When she's had several reading sessions already, I don't feel so guilty about turning on the TV every once in a while.
Get on the Floor
No, I'm not talking about dancing. (Although Rory and I have been known to blast some T-Swift and dance around the house every once in awhile.) I'm talking about actively engaging your child in play. Get down on their level and roll a ball back and forth or build a Lego tower. Give them your undivided attention, make lots of eye contact, and allow them to choose which toys to play with. It can be tempting to take control and show them the "right" way to use something, but you'll both gain more from the experience if you allow them to experiment with various objects and make their own discoveries. Even if it's only for 15 minutes, put your phone away, get down on the floor and just play.
But then I think back on my childhood, (full of Little Debbies and episodes of All My Children), and I realize that not every single second of every single day needs to be filled with meaningful learning experiences. It's okay (some would argue it's beneficial) for your child to be bored (gasp!) every once in a while so that you can do the dishes or call the cable guy, and your child can be left to her own devices. Have you ever heard the phrase, "boredom is the mother of invention"? (I'm still waiting for Rory to invent something useful.) Of course, I'm not suggesting you lock your baby in a room so that you can drink wine with the neighbor and shop online, but don't beat yourself up if you're not using baby flashcards or you've been dragging your baby around on errands all day. Stop feeling guilty that you're 15 month old doesn't know her letter sounds, and instead focus on enjoying being a mom. I've learned that anything can be turned into a learning opportunity, which is how I've (mostly) avoided mom guilt. Here are a few of my favorite ways to incorporate learning into our daily routine.
Talk to Your Kid
Let's start with the basics, people. My last few years of teaching, about 40% of my class saw the school SLP for some sort of speech/language disorder, and I am convinced that this alarming number is due to the fact that parents aren't talking to their children anymore. Harried lifestyles are mostly to blame. People are too busy to take the time to teach their children basic conversational skills. Young children spend way too much time in front of the TV or on electronic devices, which means they spend less time conversing. From the day we brought Rory home from the hospital, I vowed to talk to her as much as possible. Obviously we don't have deep conversations about her thoughts on immigration reform, but if she's next to me while I'm folding laundry, I name each item I'm folding and it's color. If I'm cooking in the kitchen, I describe to her what I'm doing and name the foods or utensils I'm using. Most of the time she just babbles back or listens, but lately she's been repeating many of my words. It's a simple thing that makes a big difference.
 |
| Taking selfies counts as quality time, right? |
Red Light Nursery Rhymes
I remember reading in one of my early literacy books in college that if your child enters kindergarten and can recite at least three classic nursery rhymes, he or she is likely to be a successful reader. I believe the correlation is based on the fact that if your child is familiar with nursery rhymes, they were probably read to often from a young age, and we all know the benefits of reading to children from the time they are born. Plus, nursery rhymes have a rhythm and often rhyme, which introduces children to the concepts of phonemes and fluency. So, every time we're in the car and we stop at a red light, I make sure to recite a few nursery rhymes. (Baa Baa Black Sheep, Hickory Dickory Dock, Jack and Jill, etc.)
Spice Cabinets and Bathroom Drawers
Rory, like every other baby on this planet, loves going through cabinets and drawers. She is pretty much obsessed with the spice cabinet. She picks up each container, smells it, shakes it, and rolls it. She can't get enough. Most of the time I'm next to her while she explores the spices, so I'll take the lid off and let her smell it, and sometimes even taste it. (If it's safe.) Her other favorite storage spaces are our bathroom drawers. In the mornings while I get ready, or while I'm cleaning the bathroom, she opens the drawers, takes everything out, carefully examines each piece, and then hands it to me. (Thank you for this half-empty, travel-size shampoo bottle!) We haven't put child locks on many cabinets in the house. Instead, I make sure to fill the cabinets and drawers that are at her level with things that are safe for her to explore. It doesn't make a difference to me if she plays with the Tupperware lids or my make-up brushes, but she seems to enjoy it, and more importantly, exploring these random items is engaging all of her senses and helping her learn more about her world.
 |
| Hard at work organizing the spices. |
 |
| Everyone has their own idea of fun...who am I to judge? |
Just Say Yes
Once Rory became mobile, I found myself constantly redirecting or telling her "no". But when I reflected on why I was denying her access to things or activities she wanted, I realized that 75% of the time it wasn't for her safety, but rather because I just didn't feel like doing the requested activity. As I teacher I know that the best learning happens when children are interested and actively engaged, so why not take her cue and allow her to do what she wants as long as it doesn't pose any danger for herself or anyone else? Since having this epiphany, I've made an effort to say "yes" whenever possible. Sure, allowing her to feed herself applesauce is messier and more time consuming, but so what? Using a spoon helps with her hand-eye coordination as well as her self-confidence. Going outside and playing in the rocks when it's 35 degrees out may not be my idea of a good time, but Rory loves feeling the different textures and experimenting with how far she can throw them.
I'm not spoiling my child...I don't say "yes" to staying up late or eating cookies or climbing on the coffee table. Children are constantly being told what to do and how to behave; I imagine it must feel nice to be in control every once in awhile. And I've discovered that the more I say yes, the more powerful my "no" has become. When you're constantly saying no, it loses it's meaning and becomes background noise. I save my "no's" for times when we're running late or something isn't safe or I just really don't feel like singing the ABC song for the 30th time.
 |
| Taking a wagon ride in the snow obviously wasn't my idea. |
When all else fails...read a book
There are times when all I want to do is turn on Baby Genius and get ten minutes of peace and quiet to check my email while Rory zones out to the sounds of children singing "Do You Know the Muffin Man", but I try to resist the urge and read her a book instead. Whenever I feel as though I've run out of options for entertaining her, I break out our latest stack of books from the library and read her a few books. Watching me read is helping Rory build a foundation for literacy success. She is learning that books contains pictures and words, that we read from left to right, and she's hearing new vocabulary. She loves to see other babies or book characters doing things she can relate to: playing at the park, eating different foods, or taking a bath. Reading is one of the primary ways that babies make connections. We read before nap time and bed time everyday, and usually several times in between. When she's had several reading sessions already, I don't feel so guilty about turning on the TV every once in a while.
Get on the Floor
No, I'm not talking about dancing. (Although Rory and I have been known to blast some T-Swift and dance around the house every once in awhile.) I'm talking about actively engaging your child in play. Get down on their level and roll a ball back and forth or build a Lego tower. Give them your undivided attention, make lots of eye contact, and allow them to choose which toys to play with. It can be tempting to take control and show them the "right" way to use something, but you'll both gain more from the experience if you allow them to experiment with various objects and make their own discoveries. Even if it's only for 15 minutes, put your phone away, get down on the floor and just play.
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| Best buds. |
Friday, January 2, 2015
What We've Been...
Celebrating We were in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico for ten days during Christmas celebrating Marcos' sister's wedding. The weather was amazing, the drinks were weak fruity, and the food was delicious. (Mostly because I didn't have to cook it.) Besides drinking and eating to my heart's content, the best part of the vacation was introducing Rory to her Brazilian family. She finally met her aunt, cousins, and several of her great-aunts. She took to them right away, which meant that Marcos and I were able to have a few adult-only dinners. (Obviously we discussed Rory the entire time.) Of course, introducing Rory to the ocean was a close second. To say she loved it would be an understatement. The first word out of her mouth every morning was "praia!" (beach); so after applying copious amounts of sunscreen, and putting on her SPF 50 rashguard and exceptionally large sunhat, we made our way to the beach where we would spend the majority of our day eating sand building sand castles and chasing seagulls. My only regret is that we missed the white Christmas that happened here in Denver this year. As much as I love the sand and surf, it didn't feel quite right spending the holiday in my bikini. Here are some of my favorite snapshots from the trip:
Cooking With I'm not sure why it took me so long to hop on the coconut oil bandwagon, but I'm on it, and I don't think I'll be jumping off anytime soon. (Okay, let's be honest...I know why it took me so long. It's because Costco never had a sale on Kirkland brand organic coconut oil before last Saturday.) I did some reading, and there seems to be a consensus in the health community about the benefits of coconut oil. It's considered the healthiest of all oils/fats, and it can be used in place of butter/oil in virtually any recipe. (It does have a slight coconut flavor.) There are also about a million uses for coconut oil that don't involve cooking, depending on your level of "crunchiness". (Not everyone is comfortable rubbing oil on their armpits, no matter how good a deodorant it is.)
Reading I did a lot of reading in Mexico, mostly while Rory napped. Of the three books I read, my favorite was "The Ship of Brides" by Jojo Moyes. Based on my sister's recommendation, I've read several of her books before, and I've enjoyed all of them. She has a gift for incorporating historic events into her novels, so I always feel as though I've learned something after reading them. This one was set on a warship after WWII that sailed from Australia to England carrying hundreds of "war brides" for the purpose of reuniting them with their solider husbands who they married during the war. It was funny, interesting, and well-written.
Pinning Now that Rory is becoming more verbal and her attention span is slightly more than that of a knat, I decided it may be beneficial for both of us if I begin to add somewhat structured lessons into our day. At this age, pretty much anything-from watching me cut an apple to roaming around in the backyard- can be considered a learning experience, but I would like to use my teaching background to help Rory begin to learn some basic math and language concepts. I am a big fan of the Montessori way of teaching; I like that it is child-centered and fosters independence and self-confidence. So, I've been pinning lots of Montessori activities for one-year-old's. I hope to start with a 10-15 minute "lesson" each day, and gradually increase that as she becomes older and more focused.
Drinking Marcos and I received an espresso machine from Santa this year. It arrived before we left for Mexico, and since then, we've been attempting to master the perfect latte. There's been a lot of trial and error, which means that we've been drinking a lot of coffee-both good and not so good. (Let's be honest...I'm not that picky when it comes to coffee. Or pizza.) I found a really tasty all-natural, agave-based vanilla syrup, and we've come to realize that whole milk is the way to go. Now that we've mastered the basics, Marcos is moving onto latte art. He made an awesome lop-sided heart for me yesterday. I'm trying not to read too much into it.
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| Oh, heeeeey! |
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| Santa?! I know him! |
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| Hanging in Santa's sleigh. |
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| Rory's cousin, Leo. |
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| So, the original plan was for Rory and Luca to walk down the aisle by themselves carrying the "Here Comes the Bride" sign. Yeah, it was a cute idea. |
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| During the ceremony. And for everyone who complains that I'm never in any pictures, that is my knee. |
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| It was a beautiful ceremony. |
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| Seconds before eating a handful of sand. |
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| Her uncle bought her some sand tools. She was in heaven. |
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| Tortilla chips and coconut water. |
Cooking With I'm not sure why it took me so long to hop on the coconut oil bandwagon, but I'm on it, and I don't think I'll be jumping off anytime soon. (Okay, let's be honest...I know why it took me so long. It's because Costco never had a sale on Kirkland brand organic coconut oil before last Saturday.) I did some reading, and there seems to be a consensus in the health community about the benefits of coconut oil. It's considered the healthiest of all oils/fats, and it can be used in place of butter/oil in virtually any recipe. (It does have a slight coconut flavor.) There are also about a million uses for coconut oil that don't involve cooking, depending on your level of "crunchiness". (Not everyone is comfortable rubbing oil on their armpits, no matter how good a deodorant it is.)
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| Good stuff. |
Reading I did a lot of reading in Mexico, mostly while Rory napped. Of the three books I read, my favorite was "The Ship of Brides" by Jojo Moyes. Based on my sister's recommendation, I've read several of her books before, and I've enjoyed all of them. She has a gift for incorporating historic events into her novels, so I always feel as though I've learned something after reading them. This one was set on a warship after WWII that sailed from Australia to England carrying hundreds of "war brides" for the purpose of reuniting them with their solider husbands who they married during the war. It was funny, interesting, and well-written.
 |
| You can't really go wrong with Jojo Moyes. |
Pinning Now that Rory is becoming more verbal and her attention span is slightly more than that of a knat, I decided it may be beneficial for both of us if I begin to add somewhat structured lessons into our day. At this age, pretty much anything-from watching me cut an apple to roaming around in the backyard- can be considered a learning experience, but I would like to use my teaching background to help Rory begin to learn some basic math and language concepts. I am a big fan of the Montessori way of teaching; I like that it is child-centered and fosters independence and self-confidence. So, I've been pinning lots of Montessori activities for one-year-old's. I hope to start with a 10-15 minute "lesson" each day, and gradually increase that as she becomes older and more focused.
 |
| I support any teaching philosophy that includes dish washing and window cleaning. |
Drinking Marcos and I received an espresso machine from Santa this year. It arrived before we left for Mexico, and since then, we've been attempting to master the perfect latte. There's been a lot of trial and error, which means that we've been drinking a lot of coffee-both good and not so good. (Let's be honest...I'm not that picky when it comes to coffee. Or pizza.) I found a really tasty all-natural, agave-based vanilla syrup, and we've come to realize that whole milk is the way to go. Now that we've mastered the basics, Marcos is moving onto latte art. He made an awesome lop-sided heart for me yesterday. I'm trying not to read too much into it.
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| One day, Marcos. One day. |
Thursday, January 1, 2015
15 for 2015
1. Make one dish from Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking".
2. Perform 5 random acts of kindness.
3. Gain 5 blog subscribers.
4. Designate September as "No Shopping Month" in which I buy only the necessities for an entire month. (And yes, coffee is considered a necessity.)
5. Read 3 books from Rory Gilmore's reading list.
6. Mow our lawn at least once. (I've never mowed the lawn before. Shocking, I know.)
7. Try a Pilates class.
8. Donate $100 to a charity/charities.
9. Print and hang pictures.
10. Send homemade Valentines to friends and family.
11. Perform 5 hours of volunteer work.
12. Record more videos.
13. Perfect a signature cocktail.
14. See at least 3 movies in the actual theater. (Anything animated doesn't count.)
15. Set and stick to a monthly grocery budget. (I will not get sucked into buying 12 pounds of coconut flour and 2,000 Double A batteries at Costco. Actually, I should probably just avoid Costco altogether.)
3. Gain 5 blog subscribers.
4. Designate September as "No Shopping Month" in which I buy only the necessities for an entire month. (And yes, coffee is considered a necessity.)
5. Read 3 books from Rory Gilmore's reading list.
6. Mow our lawn at least once. (I've never mowed the lawn before. Shocking, I know.)
7. Try a Pilates class.
8. Donate $100 to a charity/charities.
9. Print and hang pictures.
10. Send homemade Valentines to friends and family.
11. Perform 5 hours of volunteer work.
12. Record more videos.
13. Perfect a signature cocktail.
14. See at least 3 movies in the actual theater. (Anything animated doesn't count.)
15. Set and stick to a monthly grocery budget. (I will not get sucked into buying 12 pounds of coconut flour and 2,000 Double A batteries at Costco. Actually, I should probably just avoid Costco altogether.)
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