But then I think back on my childhood, (full of Little Debbies and episodes of All My Children), and I realize that not every single second of every single day needs to be filled with meaningful learning experiences. It's okay (some would argue it's beneficial) for your child to be bored (gasp!) every once in a while so that you can do the dishes or call the cable guy, and your child can be left to her own devices. Have you ever heard the phrase, "boredom is the mother of invention"? (I'm still waiting for Rory to invent something useful.) Of course, I'm not suggesting you lock your baby in a room so that you can drink wine with the neighbor and shop online, but don't beat yourself up if you're not using baby flashcards or you've been dragging your baby around on errands all day. Stop feeling guilty that you're 15 month old doesn't know her letter sounds, and instead focus on enjoying being a mom. I've learned that anything can be turned into a learning opportunity, which is how I've (mostly) avoided mom guilt. Here are a few of my favorite ways to incorporate learning into our daily routine.
Talk to Your Kid
Let's start with the basics, people. My last few years of teaching, about 40% of my class saw the school SLP for some sort of speech/language disorder, and I am convinced that this alarming number is due to the fact that parents aren't talking to their children anymore. Harried lifestyles are mostly to blame. People are too busy to take the time to teach their children basic conversational skills. Young children spend way too much time in front of the TV or on electronic devices, which means they spend less time conversing. From the day we brought Rory home from the hospital, I vowed to talk to her as much as possible. Obviously we don't have deep conversations about her thoughts on immigration reform, but if she's next to me while I'm folding laundry, I name each item I'm folding and it's color. If I'm cooking in the kitchen, I describe to her what I'm doing and name the foods or utensils I'm using. Most of the time she just babbles back or listens, but lately she's been repeating many of my words. It's a simple thing that makes a big difference.
 |
| Taking selfies counts as quality time, right? |
Red Light Nursery Rhymes
I remember reading in one of my early literacy books in college that if your child enters kindergarten and can recite at least three classic nursery rhymes, he or she is likely to be a successful reader. I believe the correlation is based on the fact that if your child is familiar with nursery rhymes, they were probably read to often from a young age, and we all know the benefits of reading to children from the time they are born. Plus, nursery rhymes have a rhythm and often rhyme, which introduces children to the concepts of phonemes and fluency. So, every time we're in the car and we stop at a red light, I make sure to recite a few nursery rhymes. (Baa Baa Black Sheep, Hickory Dickory Dock, Jack and Jill, etc.)
Spice Cabinets and Bathroom Drawers
Rory, like every other baby on this planet, loves going through cabinets and drawers. She is pretty much obsessed with the spice cabinet. She picks up each container, smells it, shakes it, and rolls it. She can't get enough. Most of the time I'm next to her while she explores the spices, so I'll take the lid off and let her smell it, and sometimes even taste it. (If it's safe.) Her other favorite storage spaces are our bathroom drawers. In the mornings while I get ready, or while I'm cleaning the bathroom, she opens the drawers, takes everything out, carefully examines each piece, and then hands it to me. (Thank you for this half-empty, travel-size shampoo bottle!) We haven't put child locks on many cabinets in the house. Instead, I make sure to fill the cabinets and drawers that are at her level with things that are safe for her to explore. It doesn't make a difference to me if she plays with the Tupperware lids or my make-up brushes, but she seems to enjoy it, and more importantly, exploring these random items is engaging all of her senses and helping her learn more about her world.
 |
| Hard at work organizing the spices. |
 |
| Everyone has their own idea of fun...who am I to judge? |
Just Say Yes
Once Rory became mobile, I found myself constantly redirecting or telling her "no". But when I reflected on why I was denying her access to things or activities she wanted, I realized that 75% of the time it wasn't for her safety, but rather because I just didn't feel like doing the requested activity. As I teacher I know that the best learning happens when children are interested and actively engaged, so why not take her cue and allow her to do what she wants as long as it doesn't pose any danger for herself or anyone else? Since having this epiphany, I've made an effort to say "yes" whenever possible. Sure, allowing her to feed herself applesauce is messier and more time consuming, but so what? Using a spoon helps with her hand-eye coordination as well as her self-confidence. Going outside and playing in the rocks when it's 35 degrees out may not be my idea of a good time, but Rory loves feeling the different textures and experimenting with how far she can throw them.
I'm not spoiling my child...I don't say "yes" to staying up late or eating cookies or climbing on the coffee table. Children are constantly being told what to do and how to behave; I imagine it must feel nice to be in control every once in awhile. And I've discovered that the more I say yes, the more powerful my "no" has become. When you're constantly saying no, it loses it's meaning and becomes background noise. I save my "no's" for times when we're running late or something isn't safe or I just really don't feel like singing the ABC song for the 30th time.
 |
| Taking a wagon ride in the snow obviously wasn't my idea. |
When all else fails...read a book
There are times when all I want to do is turn on Baby Genius and get ten minutes of peace and quiet to check my email while Rory zones out to the sounds of children singing "Do You Know the Muffin Man", but I try to resist the urge and read her a book instead. Whenever I feel as though I've run out of options for entertaining her, I break out our latest stack of books from the library and read her a few books. Watching me read is helping Rory build a foundation for literacy success. She is learning that books contains pictures and words, that we read from left to right, and she's hearing new vocabulary. She loves to see other babies or book characters doing things she can relate to: playing at the park, eating different foods, or taking a bath. Reading is one of the primary ways that babies make connections. We read before nap time and bed time everyday, and usually several times in between. When she's had several reading sessions already, I don't feel so guilty about turning on the TV every once in a while.
Get on the Floor
No, I'm not talking about dancing. (Although Rory and I have been known to blast some T-Swift and dance around the house every once in awhile.) I'm talking about actively engaging your child in play. Get down on their level and roll a ball back and forth or build a Lego tower. Give them your undivided attention, make lots of eye contact, and allow them to choose which toys to play with. It can be tempting to take control and show them the "right" way to use something, but you'll both gain more from the experience if you allow them to experiment with various objects and make their own discoveries. Even if it's only for 15 minutes, put your phone away, get down on the floor and just play.
 |
| Best buds. |
No comments:
Post a Comment