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| I'm sleeping like a baby, but my mom and dad are constantly checking the monitor to make sure I'm still breathing. |
Friday, May 30, 2014
So, This is How I Like to Sleep Now
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Mom Friends: Please Don't Talk to Me About Your Children
When I became a mom 6 short months ago, I couldn't wait to connect with other moms. I knew the joys and challenges that accompany motherhood are things that only other moms can understand. So within a month of Rory's birth, I joined my local MOPS group, signed up for several Meetup groups, and kept in touch with a few of the moms from my Bradley Method Class. Now, only a few months later, I've stopped attending MOPS meetings, I have yet to find a Meetup group I like, and I am very particular about which moms I will hang out with. In fact, I find myself preferring the company of my single, child-less friends.
The reason I often dread hanging out with other moms is a selfish one. Even though I'm almost positive they don't mean to, most fellow moms just make me feel badly about myself.
The reason I often dread hanging out with other moms is a selfish one. Even though I'm almost positive they don't mean to, most fellow moms just make me feel badly about myself.
It's nothing against you, but I don't really want to hear about how your baby is two months ahead on all of his milestones and is already sleeping through the night. And I definitely don't want to hear about how your child can nap anywhere and absolutely loves the car. In fact, I stopped listening to you ten minutes ago when I started mentally berating myself.
What am I doing wrong?
I knew I wasn't doing enough to stimulate Rory's development. I mean, do I really need to eat lunch everyday?
Maybe I should add this to the list of questions to ask the doctor next month.
Why isn't Rory solving word problems yet?
The worst are those parents who half-heartedly attempt to mask their bragging with psuedo-complaining.
He sleeps so long that sometimes I wonder if I should wake him up.
Liar. You do not wonder this. In fact, I can pretty much guarantee that this thought does not even cross your mind as you flip through your US Weekly and watch Ellen while your baby naps for hours and hours.
Or my personal favorite:
She's such a good baby. I worry that I should be doing more, but she seems so content just playing on her own while I do laundry, learn French, and make gourmet dinners from scratch. (Okay, so I may have embellished this one a bit.)
I don't think there is ever a good reason to ask another mom if her baby is sleeping through the night yet. This question should be considered as socially-inappropriate as "Did you have sex last night?" It should be reserved for best friends and sisters only. Of course there are times when you need to ask other moms for advice, and questions like these are necessary. I love when people ask me for advice because almost nothing with Rory has been easy, so most likely they end the conversation feeling as though their situation isn't as bad as they had initially thought. You're welcome.
Moms, if someone does happen to ask you if your baby is sleeping through the night, and you happen to be blessed with one of those babies that sleep for 12 hour stretches every night, LIE. Lie right to this tired, hormonal mom's face. An example of an acceptable lie would be: "Ugh, I'm still waking up twice a night. We've tried everything and Johnny still won't sleep longer than 5 hours at a time. I'm so tired."
The look of relief that you see on this mom's face will be totally worth it, trust me.
My point is that not everyone has it easy. Not everyone has a baby that sleeps through the night or takes long naps, or eats well. So, if you were blessed by the easy baby fairies, that's great, but please keep it to yourself and save other moms from the agony of comparing theirdifficult beautifully challenging babies to your easy ones.
Let's be honest, Rory cannot "play" with other children yet. Sharing drool-covered toys is the extent of her social interaction at this point. The purpose of play groups is to provide mom's with a reason to leave the house and put on something other than pajama pants. So yes, let's meet at Starbucks on a random Thursday morning. But I want to drink my iced coffee (with one pump mocha and 2% milk) in peace, without worrying if I'm doing things right for once. Talk to me about how your husband is driving you crazy or your sister still hasn't come to see the baby. Talk to me about the latest episode of the Bachelorette or how skinny Jessica Simpson is. These are topics that will make me feel human again. But, please, for one hour, let's not talk about our babies.
Unless of course you have a story about how awful your night was. I would love to hear about how you were up from 3-4 am trying to get your baby to sleep or how your baby cried the whole way to the grocery store for no apparent reason. I would love to hear stories like these because chances are, I have a few of my own to share.
She's such a good baby. I worry that I should be doing more, but she seems so content just playing on her own while I do laundry, learn French, and make gourmet dinners from scratch. (Okay, so I may have embellished this one a bit.)
I don't think there is ever a good reason to ask another mom if her baby is sleeping through the night yet. This question should be considered as socially-inappropriate as "Did you have sex last night?" It should be reserved for best friends and sisters only. Of course there are times when you need to ask other moms for advice, and questions like these are necessary. I love when people ask me for advice because almost nothing with Rory has been easy, so most likely they end the conversation feeling as though their situation isn't as bad as they had initially thought. You're welcome.
Moms, if someone does happen to ask you if your baby is sleeping through the night, and you happen to be blessed with one of those babies that sleep for 12 hour stretches every night, LIE. Lie right to this tired, hormonal mom's face. An example of an acceptable lie would be: "Ugh, I'm still waking up twice a night. We've tried everything and Johnny still won't sleep longer than 5 hours at a time. I'm so tired."
The look of relief that you see on this mom's face will be totally worth it, trust me.
My point is that not everyone has it easy. Not everyone has a baby that sleeps through the night or takes long naps, or eats well. So, if you were blessed by the easy baby fairies, that's great, but please keep it to yourself and save other moms from the agony of comparing their
Let's be honest, Rory cannot "play" with other children yet. Sharing drool-covered toys is the extent of her social interaction at this point. The purpose of play groups is to provide mom's with a reason to leave the house and put on something other than pajama pants. So yes, let's meet at Starbucks on a random Thursday morning. But I want to drink my iced coffee (with one pump mocha and 2% milk) in peace, without worrying if I'm doing things right for once. Talk to me about how your husband is driving you crazy or your sister still hasn't come to see the baby. Talk to me about the latest episode of the Bachelorette or how skinny Jessica Simpson is. These are topics that will make me feel human again. But, please, for one hour, let's not talk about our babies.
Unless of course you have a story about how awful your night was. I would love to hear about how you were up from 3-4 am trying to get your baby to sleep or how your baby cried the whole way to the grocery store for no apparent reason. I would love to hear stories like these because chances are, I have a few of my own to share.
Thursday, May 22, 2014
Magic Suit Weaning
A few months ago, I posted a review of the Merlin Magic Sleep Suit. It has done wonders for Rory's night sleep, but she is beginning to outgrow it, and rather than order the next size, Marcos and I decided to wean her from the suit. (The fact that it's been about 1,000 degrees here the past few days only validated our decision, as the Merlin Magic Sleep Suit is basically a super padded snow suit.) I was convinced that she would resist the sleepsac and have difficulty falling asleep, but she's adapted quite well. Or so I thought.
I was so tired last night that I apparently slept through Rory and Marcos' play date. But, don't worry, I got the play-by-play this morning. According to Marcos, it went something like this:
Around 10 pm, Rory rolled over onto her belly and proceeded to make cute cooing noises.
Five minutes later her cooing noises turned to cries because Rory hasn't quite figured out how to roll from her belly to her back.
So, Marcos went to her nursery and helped her get back into sleeping position.
Just as Marcos returned to bed and closed his eyes, he heard hercute cooing noises (Apparently the cooing noises became decreasingly cute as the night went on) and looked into the camera to see Rory once again on her belly.
This carried on until about 11pm when she finally fell back asleep. Luckily, Marcos took a picture so we will never forget her first night sans sleepsuit. (No matter how hard we try.)
I was so tired last night that I apparently slept through Rory and Marcos' play date. But, don't worry, I got the play-by-play this morning. According to Marcos, it went something like this:
Around 10 pm, Rory rolled over onto her belly and proceeded to make cute cooing noises.
Five minutes later her cooing noises turned to cries because Rory hasn't quite figured out how to roll from her belly to her back.
So, Marcos went to her nursery and helped her get back into sleeping position.
Just as Marcos returned to bed and closed his eyes, he heard her
This carried on until about 11pm when she finally fell back asleep. Luckily, Marcos took a picture so we will never forget her first night sans sleepsuit. (No matter how hard we try.)
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| What? You're the one who's always insisting that I do tummy time. |
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
A Rare Sighting
Said to be the offspring of an Irish mother and a Japanese father, this human baby has what many scientists refer to as pale skin. A native of sunny Colorado, she rarely ventures outside because her mother is terrified that the sun will damage her fragile skin. On the rare occasion that she is permitted to leave the house, she is never without her pink sunhat and at least two unnecessary extra layers of protective clothing. Once this species reaches 6 months of age, it is considered safe to use sunscreen. This means that her paranoid protective mother will now slather her with zinc oxide before putting on her pink sunhat and 2 extra layers of protective clothing.
Monday, May 19, 2014
A List of Things That Have Woken Rory Up
1. The washer
2. The wind
3. The garbage truck
4. The ice cream truck*
5. A sneeze
6. My text alert
7. Marli barking
8. The neighbor's lawn mower
9. The creaky top stair
10. The sound of me taking my first bite of lunch (I may have made this one up.)
*Side note: Did you know an ice cream cone costs $3.50 now?!
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Why I Broke My Number One Sleep Training Rule
Well readers, lock me up in mommy jail and throw away the key. Yesterday, I broke the number one, most important sleep training rule: I nursed Rory back to sleep during her afternoon nap. Gasp! But before you start pelting me with Legos and ban me for life from the good mom club, let me explain myself.
The past week has been crazy in the Fukumoto house, to say the least. Marcos' parents, his sister, AND his sister's fiance are visiting from Brazil, Dallas, and California, respectively. I know all you other Type A's out there feel my pain. I've had anxiety about this visit for months now. Every time I brought up one of my "concerns" to Marcos, I swear I saw his hand twitch.
Make sure they wash their hands before they hold her.
They have to be quiet when she takes a nap.
They should rent a car so they're not sitting around all day.
Tell your mom she can't pick her up if she cries in the middle of the night.
You're going to make sure you're home to help me with bedtime, right?
Make sure they know that they can't all take a shower at the same time, or we'll run out of hot water.
Needless to say, it's been a long 5 days...and I still have 5 more to go. Every where I turn there are people! People asking me where something is or how something works. I've grown accustomed to spending my whole day alone with Rory and Marli, so it's been quite an adjustment for sure.
Rory, on the other hand, is in heaven. She has not one, but five playmates at her beck and call all day long. Every morning I sneak out of the house to get coffee and leave her with her aunt and grandparents. When I return half an hour later, she looks at me with a puzzled expression as if to say, "Oh you. I didn't realize you had left."
Unfortunately, all of this excitement has wrecked havoc on her nap schedule. She's not used to all the extra noise in the house, and she's such a light sleeper that a loud sneeze woke her up from her morning nap yesterday. I kid you not. A sneeze. So, I was relieved when everyone left to go shopping during her afternoon nap. I figured she was so tired that she would sleep for at least 2 hours. So, when she began stirring an hour into her nap, I was determined to let her put herself back to sleep without any interference from me. I anxiously watched on the video monitor as she tried again and again to transition into the next sleep cycle. Eventually, her whines turned into a full blown cry, and I knew that I had two choices:
1. Allow her to keep crying until she reached our time limit, or
2. Sneak into her room and "help" her go back to sleep.
To be honest, my decision was a selfish one. I hate hearing her cry and I knew that if we were all going to survive the sushi dinner we had planned, she needed a good nap. So, I sneaked into her room, quietly lifted her out of her crib and proceeded to nurse her. She fell asleep within minutes, but rather than put her back in her crib, I decided to just watch her sleep...something I haven't done in months.
After spending less time with her these past few days, I felt disconnected. So, I decided to take the opportunity to enjoy my baby and appreciate all of the little things that I've been too busy to notice lately. I noticed that her feet were hanging off of her nursing pillow. Wasn't it just yesterday that the same pillow seemed to swallow her up? I noticed that her hair was getting lighter and starting to wave slightly. (Finally some proof that she shares my DNA.) I noticed that her eyelashes cast long shadows on her cheeks while she was sleeping. I noticed that she still has a small dimple in her right cheek. I noticed that her hand was wrapped tightly around my finger while she slept. I noticed that tears were running down my cheeks as I sat there and listened to the melting snow outside the window and watched my baby sleep.
I'll be the first one to tell you that nursing your baby to sleep will surely backfire on you when it's time to wean or you are trying to get your baby to sleep through the night. But, I have no regrets about breaking this rule yesterday. Sometimes you just have to rock your baby to sleep. And not because they need it, but because you do.
The past week has been crazy in the Fukumoto house, to say the least. Marcos' parents, his sister, AND his sister's fiance are visiting from Brazil, Dallas, and California, respectively. I know all you other Type A's out there feel my pain. I've had anxiety about this visit for months now. Every time I brought up one of my "concerns" to Marcos, I swear I saw his hand twitch.
Make sure they wash their hands before they hold her.
They have to be quiet when she takes a nap.
They should rent a car so they're not sitting around all day.
Tell your mom she can't pick her up if she cries in the middle of the night.
You're going to make sure you're home to help me with bedtime, right?
Make sure they know that they can't all take a shower at the same time, or we'll run out of hot water.
Needless to say, it's been a long 5 days...and I still have 5 more to go. Every where I turn there are people! People asking me where something is or how something works. I've grown accustomed to spending my whole day alone with Rory and Marli, so it's been quite an adjustment for sure.
Rory, on the other hand, is in heaven. She has not one, but five playmates at her beck and call all day long. Every morning I sneak out of the house to get coffee and leave her with her aunt and grandparents. When I return half an hour later, she looks at me with a puzzled expression as if to say, "Oh you. I didn't realize you had left."
Unfortunately, all of this excitement has wrecked havoc on her nap schedule. She's not used to all the extra noise in the house, and she's such a light sleeper that a loud sneeze woke her up from her morning nap yesterday. I kid you not. A sneeze. So, I was relieved when everyone left to go shopping during her afternoon nap. I figured she was so tired that she would sleep for at least 2 hours. So, when she began stirring an hour into her nap, I was determined to let her put herself back to sleep without any interference from me. I anxiously watched on the video monitor as she tried again and again to transition into the next sleep cycle. Eventually, her whines turned into a full blown cry, and I knew that I had two choices:
1. Allow her to keep crying until she reached our time limit, or
2. Sneak into her room and "help" her go back to sleep.
To be honest, my decision was a selfish one. I hate hearing her cry and I knew that if we were all going to survive the sushi dinner we had planned, she needed a good nap. So, I sneaked into her room, quietly lifted her out of her crib and proceeded to nurse her. She fell asleep within minutes, but rather than put her back in her crib, I decided to just watch her sleep...something I haven't done in months.
After spending less time with her these past few days, I felt disconnected. So, I decided to take the opportunity to enjoy my baby and appreciate all of the little things that I've been too busy to notice lately. I noticed that her feet were hanging off of her nursing pillow. Wasn't it just yesterday that the same pillow seemed to swallow her up? I noticed that her hair was getting lighter and starting to wave slightly. (Finally some proof that she shares my DNA.) I noticed that her eyelashes cast long shadows on her cheeks while she was sleeping. I noticed that she still has a small dimple in her right cheek. I noticed that her hand was wrapped tightly around my finger while she slept. I noticed that tears were running down my cheeks as I sat there and listened to the melting snow outside the window and watched my baby sleep.
I'll be the first one to tell you that nursing your baby to sleep will surely backfire on you when it's time to wean or you are trying to get your baby to sleep through the night. But, I have no regrets about breaking this rule yesterday. Sometimes you just have to rock your baby to sleep. And not because they need it, but because you do.
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| Pardon the drool...we're teething. |
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